Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Good comes out of even the worst experiences.

While eating my delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich (you're never too old, right?!?) for lunch and reading "Travelers' Tales Cuba", I came across the most fitting chapter of the book. (Given my boyfriend's Cuban background...and my lack of cultural experiences, outside of Acapulco for Spring Break, Canada for NYE, and Jamaica for vacation...I snatched this book up in hopes of broadening my horizons and hopefully bringing us closer :) )

No hay mal que por bien no venga...roughly translates to: good comes out of even the worst experiences.

I believe that I have mentioned in earlier blogs my belief in the need to hit rock bottom before experiencing true growth, and I feel that this saying (and apparent "quintessential Cuban expression/mantra") truly embodies that belief. I have a couple of people in my life who are struggling and sometimes feel lost, and I hope that they may read this blog and start to gain a glimpse of hope. For me...hitting rock bottom changed my life. And I will say that rock bottom is different for everyone. And maybe I wasn't at the lowest of the lows, and people can argue that it could have been worse, yada yada...but for me...I was so unhappy in every aspect of my life that I considered my state to be at rock bottom. I had reached the point where I was lying to everyone close to me, abusing alcohol, giving up on work, losing friends, and completing losing what little self esteem that I had. And when you are experience the "worst experiences", you don't believe that good will come...and you sometimes even convince yourself that you deserve the bad and will never deserve the good...

But then (and this is my hope for my friends currently at a loss) get a small glimpse of realize that making your life better will take work and will require change but you become dedicated to the goal of happiness. You long for the good. Believing that life can only be one way is absurd...and being trapped at an unhappy place because you see no other alternatives is unrealistic. (Let me note that some situations will require years of work and assistance, and can not be fixed with a couple of changes...but I am talking about being unhappy socially, at work, in relationships, with your body, where you live, etc etc).

So my hope for you is that you realize and embrace the good that can come from the worst experiences. When times are truly awful and you are tempted to give up or consider yourself a failure, reassess the situation. View that terrible experience as a learning process. Figure out how to work up from that point and work! The challenges and terrible experiences that life throws at us make us stronger...they make us more prepared for the future and they force us to aim to be better.

And if nothing else...just think, it can't get any worse, right? (Being able to laugh at yourself is also a key quality that will help you cope with some rough situations).

Keep your head up, make goals, make changes, and good things will happen :)


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