Thursday, July 29, 2010

Exercise....for more than your love handles.

Good morning friends,

The following rant is inspired by the media. First, the Jenny Craig commercial with that shitty actress from MadTV. She talked about how she lost so much weight by just eating and occasionally walking. Then, the Too Fat for 15 show starting on the Style Channel. Both of these things irritate the crap out of me. I don't think calling people fat is a good idea at all, nor is telling teenagers that suffer from eating disorders already, that being fat is bad and wrong. And I despise Jenny Craig and stuff because minimizing calories with crappy processed frozen food is not how to get healthy.

So anyways...this is all leading to my point that exercise is fabulous and can be fabulous for everyone. You don't even have to consider it "exercise" if that term bothers you, consider it an activity. Do you realize how many different types of activities and exercises exist? Do you know why all of these activities exist? Because there is something for everyone. I promise you that if you go out and explore all the different types of active things to do you are bound to find something that you like. Maybe not running, maybe not organized sports, maybe not lifting weights....but maybe something like dancing or swimming, basketball, tennis, creative, just be active!

Okay my second point...and probably most important, is that I believe people need to look beyond the weight loss aspects of exercise. Once you find an activity that you enjoy (or even if you aren't too thrilled with it but you push yourself to your limits), you will reap the additional (and more important) benefits= happiness, relaxation, stress relief, sense of accomplishment, better sleep, better immune system. For me, exercise is the one part of my day where I am by myself (usually), its just me and the road, or my bike, or a boxing bag...and I am able to think clearly or clear my head completely. For me, it adds structure to my day, it makes me feel a sense of accomplishment before the rest of the world has woken up or when the rest of the world goes home to couch it after work. I believe that once you can see all of the other benefits of exercise, then you can learn to love it and make it apart of your daily routine and then you will naturally see your body change and become healthier. If you are constantly striving for weight loss, you will consistently be will be constantly weighing yourself and becoming discouraged. But if you can go to your favorite Zumba class at the gym, or go for a nice bike ride in the morning, and enjoy yourself then you will be ENCOURAGED and stick with it. Exercise can also be largely a social thing. You can go for walks in the morning with a friend, you can take classes together...and then you are helping yourself AND improving your relationships with others.

I could rant about this for hours and honestly exercising is different for everyone and everyone enjoys different things. My point is that you don't have to run races or do spin classes to is a unique interest to everyone, but it is super important for sooooo many reasons, reasons beyond losing weight. Now I challenge you to try out a variety of new activities or exercises next week and see if you can find one you enjoy, something you can stick with....and then I challenge you to focus on how you feel after you exercise. Notice the relaxation, notice the sense of pride, and watch how your mentality changes over time. THIS will keep you committed and THIS will maintain a healthy lifestyle in the long run.

Best of luck :)


Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Exercise, Relax, Do

(my interpretation of Eat, Pray, Love....for any female who hasn't read that book, read it!)

So while reading Eat, Pray, Love, I realized I shared many of the same characteristics as the main character, mainly in my emotional connection/devotion when dating. When I date someone (whether they realize this or not) I tend to give my entire self to them, which may not necessarily be an awful thing but it is when you lose sight of yourself and your needs. And the issue isn't that I do it because I feel like I have to, the issue is I do it because I want to, because when I have a boyfriend, fulfilling their needs is more important than my own. Well...that is just no good...and it's incredibly exhausting. And prior to my boyfriends, I did this same thing with my rarely has my life been selfish and purely for my happiness.

Also, in the past couple months of being sober and in the past couple weeks of being single, I have realized the pleasure of living my life and fulfilling my needs. Soo...given those two realizations I have decided to begin a year of Me...a year of exercising, relaxing and doing.

Exercising for me is integral for my longer having anything to do with weight loss, it has to do with mental relaxation, feeling of accomplishment and overall well-being. So in August I have a triathlon, October a half marathon and a full marathon! So I plan to devote my time to training...properly and actually setting goals. (in another blog I discussed how I refuse to train or set goals because of a fear of failure). Then after the races are over, I'd like to focus on my kickboxing and actually work on fighting in the ring.

Relaxing is more of a reminder to me that I cannot please everyone and shouldn't please others while sacrificing myself. So I plan to relax when I want and not commit myself to everything when I do not necessarily feel up to doing it. I also have started to turn off my computer because I read that more women are checking facebook first thing in the morning and right before bed, and I refuse to continue to be that person. And lastly, I am trying not to carry my phone on me at all times so my attention can be focused on the people I am with or focused on myself when I want to be alone.

Doing has more to do with sobriety. As I have stated before, I want to do more things and find more hobbies unrelated to drinking activities. There are tons of things to do in DC so I'd like to venture out and explore (while keeping a healthy balance of exercising and relaxing).

Well no where in here does it say love, because I know myself. And I know that the second I seriously date someone, I will succumb to their world and put aside these goals that I have set for myself. And while that is not bad at all, and marriage takes compromises, and doing things for others is fulfilling, and all that...I think it would be very good for me to leave that element of life out for a while. Since college I have been dating and regularly bending over backwards for another person (training from DC to Bmore, driving from EC to Rockville, and being in a relationship since I moved to Arlington) I think this is a good decision.

Now, a key thing to making promises (much like committing to being sober)is not making it public because then if you fail you have more people to judge your failure. not criticize if I do not follow through with this for an entire year. BUT, I want to. And if I meet someone, then if hes a good person, he will wait.

That is all for now. Back to work :)


Wednesday, July 21, 2010

SSSF seeking SSSM??

Single, Sober, Sexy Female seeking...a single, sober, sexy male?!? I wonder how this will play out.

So being recently single and the first time single since I have quit drinking, I am a tad scared on how it will be perceived by guys...guys my guys. I have been asking around and so far the consensus from my guy friends has been that if a guy thinks it's a turn off or weird that I don't drink, then I probably wouldn't want him. Which seems correct, BUT are they just saying that to be nice? How should I approach this? Clearly I would avoid "going out for drinks" as a first date. But once the situation arises where drinking is a factor (basically everything in the world other than exercising...scratch that, hashing involves yes, everything in the world), what do I say? "Um I am just going to have a water, I am not drinking tonight".(then what do I do if there is a second date??).."Um I am just going to have a diet coke, I don't drink anymore". Then the questions arises, why? Because I can see saying something along the lines of, well I am getting older and thought it would be a good time to cut back...that makes sense, BUT that is cutting back, not cutting off. I feel as though, cutting off completely is obvious that I couldn't handle drinking and quit cold turkey. So do I say that up front, "Um I quit because getting drunk wasn't really working out for me anymore"...still, cutting back would work in that situation...sooo basically the response would be "Um I quit because I couldn't handle drinking anymore and felt it was best if I just didn't have alcohol period." And THAT, my friends, is a red flag for someone with a drinking I don't know if guys think this way, but do you want to start a relationship with someone that right off the bat has issues and could pass alcoholism on to your children??

I think I'd prefer if I dated someone that already knew my deal. Maybe if I friend explained what I was doing with my life so that I didn't have to. Or I guess I really need to own my decision. I think that their perception on my decision will be based a lot on my execution of the reasoning. So if I own my decision and say confidently that drinking wasn't working out and I didn't want to do it anymore but I am fine if other people drink casually (not heavily) and that it has worked out really well for me thus far, that could go over well and show some signs of independence, maturity, blah blah. BUT, if I awkwardly say that I quit because I was just not handling myself anymore and made some bad decisions and am weird about it...theeen that doesn't come off super great. And I am quit fearful that my dumb, awkward ass will do the latter.

Also...considering what alcohol has done to my family, myself and people I care about, I would honestly prefer a guy that HARDLY drank. Maybe a couple beers at tailgates, parties or whatever. But not someone that even drinks every time we go out to dinner. I feel like this is going to be a VERY hard thing to find.

So...for my trusty followers...get excited because my blog will hopefully take an exciting turn into the world of sober dating and I can fill you all in on the trials and tribulations. :) And I haven't even touched on how AWKWARD dating will probably be without that lovely alcoholic cushion!! But alas another day, another blog my friends.


Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Survived Vegas Sober!

That should deserve an award. I went to Vegas for a whole week last week and managed to stay sober. I feel that is quite the accomplishment considering the entire time you are gambling people are offering you cocktails. I will say I probably hurt my body with Diet Cokes but thats okay. I guess sobriety sort of changed my agenda in Vegas also...I didn't go to any clubs and hardly went to any bars just to party. And I actually didn't mind. I used to miss clubs because I thought I loved dancing...but who really loves being fondled by gross dudes and getting all sweaty? Well maybe I like getting sweaty...but in the comfort of my own home. It was also kind of nice to wake up at a decent hour and have an entire day to really enjoy'd be surprised how much there is to do there other than the clubs. Anyways...I felt that was an accomplishment and I am happy that I did it. I don't wish I would have drank nor do I regret going there.

(Also, I am sorry for anyone who read my last blog post. I was really upset about the loss of a lot of friends and I said some things I didn't mean. I take responsibility for what has happened and I miss and love everyone)