Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Everything happens for a reason?

I just wanted to thank everyone who has sent me messages of support. It really means a lot. Change is never easy but being complacent in your life is. I was driving and "Why Georgia?" came on, and I've always loved the line "still everything happens for a reason is no reason not to ask yourself if you are living it right". And I think that is very true. When I started drinking and started doing stupid stuff and hooking up with guys, I would always tell myself that everything happens for a reason and that helped me cope with the guilt and shame and assume that someday it will all make sense. Now, I guess it did in the long run but I don't think it should have necessarily taken me this long to get here.

To be honest, I stopped drinking for my boyfriend. And had he dumped me the week after I promised to stop drinking, I would have said F it and drank again. BUT, he didn't and slowly I made myself a sober life and once I realized the personal benefits that it had then I made the decision "my own". But it is hard to change anything. And what's interesting is that it is even harder to change something for your own personal well being (which one would think would be the best reason to do it), but its easy to accept you who are and rationalize that lifestyle and your actions. And I will say in many respects you should be true to yourself and people should love you for you, but there are many times when some self-reflection and change wouldn't hurt. But maybe that is why we have so many people in our lives...to provide us with direction...and to allow us to see the results of our actions. So my thought is...don't accept your life if you aren't really happy because a change may help you to find a side of you that was lost or never discovered and you will be happier than you ever were before.

Also, this is one of my lovely matras= Be Stronger than your Excuses. Yes, this is from a billboard in Bmore for MAC gym but I think it's awesome. It is SO easy to make excuses: why you can't go to the gym, why you can't go to the store to get healthy foods and have to buy fast food, why you have to go out partying because everyone else is. And you can let the excuse win. But there is a real sense of accomplishment in having a couple of excuses in mind, and then saying No Mr. Excuse, Go F Yourself, and then doing what you know deep down you should. And the result afterwards, the sense of accomplishment that you were about to bail but you didn't...is awesome. I believe there is always a reason for why we do things...maybe be our parents upbringing, our friends, society, the weather, blah blah...but there is never an excuse.

(I apologize this one wasn't very funny haha...I'll try to make the next one better)


~Thanks again~

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